Anniversaries: Measuring a year in a relationship

As per ‘Seasons of love’ from RENT you may choose to measure your relationship in time, 523,600 minutes to be exact. If you’re in a long-distance relationship it maybe be more ‘500 miles’ by The Proclaimers. Whatever the circumstances everyone has a way of measuring their time together, be it first kiss, first date, first ‘sleepover’ or perhaps all three (remember the friend’s episode where Phoebe celebrates her first anniversary with Mike). I am 29 and I have just completed my first 1-year anniversary in a committed relationship. I’ll be honest I felt a bit embarrassed about this and even more so about wanting to mark the occasion.

Most people I know have been together for 5, even 10 years, and when hearing about my upcoming anniversary joked ‘1 year, let me know when you make it 10!’ or opted for ‘aww that’s so cute’. None of these people meant to cause offence but it did make me question ‘well when it is acceptable to celebrate?’

”Whatever the circumstances everyone has a way of measuring their time together, be it first kiss, first date, first ‘sleepover’ or perhaps all three”

Before meeting Dan, I was single for a long time, if my single life had a movie equivalent it was the Lord of the rings trilogy watched back to back, if it was a book? War & Peace and to put it in the context for all millennials to understand, it lasted from the I-phone 4 to the I-phone 7! I was basically at the stage of accepting I was just one of those people who wasn’t going to get married or have a family and would take coach holidays to the Outer Hebrides with their mum (although my best mate and I have genuinely considered this). I’d tried internet dating and match made dates through friends, all at a complete loss and each one pushing me to the acceptance that a relationship wasn’t for me. Seriously I had some awful dates but more on that another time. Because of this when I met Dan I instinctively pushed him away, I even turned him down when he first asked me out, fearing the repercussions of another bad date.

This last year has been the happiest of my life, not because I have a boyfriend but because I have the right one! I waited for the right one. I’ve done more things this year because of his support and encouragement than I have in most of my adult life and I can only hope I provide him with the same support. So, I might be new at this and in the grand scheme of things a year may not be that long but I decided to embrace our 1-year anniversary as a symbol of how far we’ve come and a marker of how far we have to go. So, friends be prepared for annual anniversary hashtags, romantic selfies and 2 people looking disgustingly happy. It will only be one day but I’ve waited (what feels like) a lifetime for it.

How did we celebrate this year? With a gin bus of course (by Foozie events) and a drink in our first date bar – The Old Duke.

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